I myself have been through and am going through a rollercoaster ride, when it comes to family and friends and what my idea of a healthy relationship is.
Feeling upset inside, feelings of not being good enough. Asking myself over and over again, how did it get to this point, should not steal our gift of living in our present moment.
We should do all we can to use this experience to validate ourselves, and to realise we are good enough; maybe we have changed, and from these changes, relationships freeze; we have conflict; our relationships might shift up or down a gear. This is relative to each and every one of us, so you are never alone.
Feeling stuck in any relationship is a state that many of us may encounter at some point. It is characterized by a series of emotional, communicative, and behavioral signs that reflect a stagnation or deterioration in the relationship's dynamics.
Understanding these signs can help us to recognize problems early and seek solutions to improve or revitalise the relationship.
To have freedom in relationships, we do need to consider a few important factors, which I'll chat about below. Feel free to comment and let me know if you could take some advice from the blog. I love to hear from you and value your opinions.
Here are some common signs of feeling stuck in a relationship:
Lack of Communication - Freedom in Relationships
One of the most apparent signs of a stuck relationship is a significant decrease in communication. We may find that we are talking less frequently about feelings, plans, or day-to-day activities.
When communication becomes superficial, we may feel disconnected from each other's lives. Important issues are left undiscussed, leading to misunderstandings and a buildup of unresolved conflicts.
Initiate regular, structured conversations to share thoughts and concerns openly. Establish a safe space where everyone feels heard without judgment. This is a good start to becoming unstuck and finding freedom in your relationships.
Lost Connection - Freedom in Relationships
A lost emotional connection is often a core issue in relationships that feel stuck. This can manifest as a lack of interest [In romantic relationships, partners may feel more like roommates than romantic partners, with little to no affectionate touch, shared laughter, or emotional support]. This loss of connection is sometimes gradual, and can go unnoticed until the relationship feels significantly strained.
Engage in activities that everyone can enjoy or have previously shared a passion for, to revive the emotional connection.
Revisiting past positive experiences together can also be beneficial. Remember your goal is to have freedom in your relationship, so embrace your true past connections, what made them work for you ?
Conflicting Values
Over time, individuals in any relationship can evolve in ways that lead to changes in their own life values, beliefs, or life goals.
When these changes lead to conflicts in values that are core to each others identity or vision for the future, it can create a deep divide. For instance, differing views on how we bring up our children, career importance, or how we choose to live our life, can become significant sources of contention. This is true for siblings, best friends, even partners.
Acknowledge and respect differences without imposing beliefs on each other. Seek common ground and "agree to disagree" where values do not align, focusing on aspects of the relationship that are harmonious. One person might grow in their mindset, another stagnates, the balance shifts, if you are aware this is one way of realising you can actually find freedom in your relationship.
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Routine and Boredom
While routine can provide stability, an unchanging day-to-day pattern without any excitement or new experiences can lead to boredom and a sense of monotony.
This feeling can diminish the joy and satisfaction friends, siblings, even partners feel in their relationship with you. This can be a main reason contributing to the sensation of being stuck, losing friends, not feeling heard. Your sense of joy is a gift you choose daily.
As our tastes change with age, we need to introduce possible new experiences or projects into your interactions. This could be as simple as changing movies to the theatre or even opera, or trying out a new hobby together. I went to opera with two friends, and absolutely loved it! I never thought I would enjoy it, and have now booked to go to another. I'm finding my own sense of freedom as I challenge myself and encourage my inner self to take a leap of faith and taste life a little differently.
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Resentment Building
Resentment can accumulate from unresolved disputes, perceived inequalities in the relationship, or unmet expectations. Over time, these feelings can harden, causing each person to become less forgiving and more critical of the other.
This ongoing negativity can make many of us going through changes in our relationships feel trapped into a hostile environment.
Address grievances as they arise instead of letting them fester. Practice forgiveness and seek to understand the other person's perspective to mitigate feelings of resentment. Talking openly and honestly is always the way forward.
Avoidance of Conflict
Sometimes, to maintain a semblance of peace, individuals might start avoiding any conversations or situations that could lead to conflict.
This avoidance can indicate fear of engaging in discussions that might reveal irreconcilable differences or lead to emotional discomfort.
Develop a strategy to approach conflict constructively. Use "I" statements to express your feelings without blaming the other person and work together to find solutions.
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Lack of Effort
When one person stops putting effort into the relationship, it's a clear sign of stagnation.
This might include not celebrating important dates, skipping efforts to surprise or delight each other, or generally not investing time and energy into maintaining the relationship.
Make a conscious effort to invest in the relationship. Small gestures of appreciation or acknowledgement can show that you value the relationship and the other person’s role in your life.
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Dependency Without Satisfaction
In some stuck relationships, dependency develops where one or both partners feel they cannot function independently, yet they are not satisfied with the relationship. This can create a complex situation where leaving feels as difficult as staying.
Assess the roots of dependency, if you were there for each other during a particularly hard time, and are now through it, work towards a more balanced relationship where both parties feel independent yet connected.
Encouraging individual interests, giving each other space to enjoy other friendships, can strengthen personal satisfaction and contribute to a healthier relationship.
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No Future Plans
A lack of enthusiasm or outright avoidance of talking about the future together can suggest doubts about the longevity or desirability of the relationship.
This may manifest as hesitation to make long-term commitments or plans, such as planning trips together, going places together even having lunch or dinner together.
Openly discuss the future and each person’s expectations or visions for the relationship. Planning future activities or setting mutual goals can reinforce commitment and shared purpose.
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Addressing these signs involves open communication, counseling, and sometimes personal reflection to determine if and how the relationship can move forward. Counseling can provide tools and frameworks to help partners communicate more effectively, resolve conflicts, reconnect emotionally, and align their goals and values.
In some cases, it may also help us recognize when it might be healthier to part ways. Recognizing these signs is the first step towards making informed decisions about the future of the relationship.
Remember too, implementing these solutions requires patience and commitment from all involved parties.
Feeling stuck in a relationship doesn't mean you're out of options, it just means it's time to explore new ones.
If you are ready to explore your own strengths and values, let me know, we can get together and chat about options available that might offer some "aha" moments and offer you freedom to choose who and why you have the different people in your life right now.
When you become aware and in touch with what serves your higher self, passion, confidence and being happy and contentment will follow you. Click the link to book a 15 minute chat session https://calendly.com/rose-ihs/transformation-chat
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